Ode to Noelle: The Halloween Costume That Beckoned The Most Male Attention

You need one of these:




It was a little difficult to drink out of...





...but it was, by far, the Halloween costume that attracted the most male attention. And not in a creepy way. So for future reference... ditch that skank costume and get your hands on one of these babies:



















(P.S. Does anyone know who the joker was? An Tua Nua? Last Thursday? We're dying to know...)

If I were Barack Obama...

... for Halloween.

TechCrunch told me that Obama Halloween masks are outselling McCain masks 57% to 43%. Maybe I should join the party. Then Ali (slash Sarah Palin) and I can squander over economic policies and Russia all night when not hunting for needlessly exposed girls to mock relentlessly.

Ooh this could be good.

Marack Obama: Part male, part female, part black, part white, part presidential candidate, part collegiate intern. It's like a Halloween miracle! Or nightmare...

Uh oh...

I feel one of those Saved By The Bell dream-cloud-other-dimension-experience arising...

(Marack and the girls in Boston...)

(Marack and the family at a Red Wings game...)

(Marack pre-shotgun in Ann Arbor...)

(Marack being strangled by a Korean on a roof...)

(Marack being dipped...)

.

I feel bad for any non-college residents in the area.

UGH HALLOWEEN.

The frenzy has begun. Four of my friends have purchased their Halloween costumes but, like every other year, I will be leaving my costume in the hands of fate.

Freshman year I was nothing, sophomore year I was a pirate (I had a parrot attached to my shoulder and a kick ass challice) and last year I was Xena Warrior Princess. Who knows what this year will bring.

If I were crafty and could find a giant Cookie Monster, I'd be the Cookie Monster Slayer.

If I were a man I'd be Borat-at-the-beach.

But, alas, I am neither.

One of my friends suggested we all be Britney Spears at various stages of her life. I shottied Mental Breakdown Britney.

Of course going bald would be terrifying and unattractive and people might confuse me for a deranged man but HEY! At least I wouldn't be confused with the mass hordes of slutty BU hos traipsing around on All Hallow's Eve!