Ways to save money: Text Edition

Get wise friends instead of paying for therapy

3/1 JESS The kid is clueless. Drop the zero and get with a hero... Or just find someone better with no rhyme scheme involved

4/6 JESS You can take a picture of him and upload it to the blog with using less than five words... Epic tool. P.S. Try sleeping tonight. You are too nocturnal. I'm convinced you're part bat. Not in a gross way. Just in a nocturnal way.

4/15 TARA Ew to both of those. We are surrounded by tools.

Enlist overprotective relatives as bodyguards

3/23 JOE He better not be a bitch. If shit goes down and he can't protect you OOH I'll kill him.

Only be friends with entertaining people

3/6 JESS Booty call and mom. Now that's just two things I always put together.

3/27 ROOMMATE Dear Maria, sorry I got so drunk and acted like some sort of foolish monkey.

4/1 ERIN When I get home from class can I trade you my wine glass for a ham?

4/15 CHRISTINA Pretty soon girl I'll be lathering you with oil at the Boston Commons/ BU beach

4/16 SARAH Yea I'm here already starting my night off right with dollar beers and old men.

4/19 ZACH How could you not know? He sweated carrot juice.

4/24 P.I.C. When I came into work my boss goes, your eyes are all bloodshot. I'm like, oh yea it's allergies.

5/3 ALI Tara's eating pepperoni. 

Intern at an awesome office

3/27 JESS Are you coming in today?! There is an epic amount of new snacks.

Go to hockey games (not money saving, but worth the splurge)

3/28 DAD I just saw you on TV doing the pointing thing. (READ: calling the opposition's goalie a siv.)

3/30 ALI Just showered and still feel like I smell like beer and steak tips.

4/12 JOHN Sedan or SUV? We're in a charoal grey Honda minivan. I'll be the one flashing my nips @ you.

Random cheap entertainment

David at the Dentist? Or Joe at the surgeon?

3/20 JOE Haha oh well it makes me drool Fool. Tool. Pool. Cool. Mule. What are you doing? Being cruel? Hollaaa.

25 cent wing night.

4/4 STEVE We all know you're not going to the bar for a chicken wing.

The internet.

4/6 ALI I am not meeting your weird internet friends.